Belle Of The Boulevard

Time for change is now

2009-12-19T00:57:00.002+08:00

Phew, last few weeks was insanely busy and fun at the same time. Now is the time. Must make full use of this 2 weeks.

Next Week

2009-12-04T21:58:00.001+08:00

Here's what is going to happen starting next week.

- Going to start training again. Improving strength, endurance, speed, power, agility, flexibility, accuracy and precision. Covering running, swimming, skipping, weight-lifting, body-weighted training, old-school training, acrobatics, gymnastics, parkouring. This is going to be the most intense one yet.

- I haven train for a few months and i'm still around the same weight, maybe lighter due to loss of muscles.. From next week onwards my metabolism rate will increase like crazy, my fats percentage will also drop like crazy. Low fat percentage isn't good by the way. There is no fats to protect your organs which can cause damages. So, need to change my diet to suit the intense training.

- Going to read as much books i can. Everytime i see those books i kept wishing how i can have the time and energy to read them. The pile of books i want to read is getting higher.

- To cope with everything from school work to work to reading to the intense trainings and everything i need to do, i need to change my sleeping habits. Sleep early and rise early.

Peew, actually i'm kind of frightened by all this and in the meantime excited and looking forward to monday. i'm in (a little) doubt whether i can do it. =) In one month's time (4 jan 2010), it will be a new me? i should be feeling quite comfortable in my new life and my new body haha. If things don't go smoothly, i might somewhere in the month faint from fatigue =/

Maybe after 1 month's time
- PU? haha

Prayers

2009-12-02T20:13:00.002+08:00

3rd post for today! Suddenly feels the urge to keep writing.

Althought praying is normally linked to religions, but it is not limit to religious people. Prayer is a powerful tool to have. Most are clueless to the power of praying.

To sidetrack abit, I still remembered one of my teachers teaching us that we are made up of 4 parts. Body, Mind, Spirit, Soul. It is when this 4 parts are develop and attended to equally that you will be healthy and well.

"Our body responds to the way we think and feel. This is so-called "mind body connection" When we are stressed, upset or under emotional pressure, our body tries to tell us that about it and we experience some physical problem. For example, you may have high blood pressure when you hear something shocking.

Keep in mind, if your mind is healthy, you have a healthy body, healthy spirit and healthy soul. Good health of body and mind is important for a healthy and happy living. Life can be only wonderful if you are in perfect health."

And coming back, praying can helps us strengthen our body, mind, spirit and soul in one way or another.

Praying can renew one's spiritual connection with a power outside themselves. Research shows that when Catholics prayed before they eat their food, the body is different compared to those who didnt pray. The body becomes more 'open' to the food, thus able to absorb more efficiently and of course the food becomes 'better'.

Whats more amazing is praying to water. Water itself is an amazing substance. It is the more susceptible to thoughts compared to other objects/substances.

This is water before prayer:

This is water after prayer:

See how beautiful it is! If you send positive and loving thoughts to the bottle/cup of water you are about to drink it will becomes like this beautiful crystal althought we can't see if with our bare eyes. And remember, isn't our body made up of 90% water? So, if you think positive and loving thoughts the water inside of you will transform also! If you pray and love others, so will theirs!

I suddenly felt like praying just now and i did. After im done, a wave of happiness washed over me. It is happiness in a deeper level.
Althought i had known these facts for sometime now, i never really make use of them for whatever reason. But im going to start praying once in a while now, for myself and others. =)

A Thin Line

2009-12-02T18:51:00.001+08:00

2nd post of the day! The previous post is suppose to be titled "A Thin Line" but it got kind of long before i even reached this point..

I just released it in some ways that there is really only a thin line between good and 'evil'. Some people crosses between them quite often, some stayed on one side constantly.

With increase of power, the chances of crossing to the side of 'evil' will increase and with increase of knowledge, the degrees to which this evility will go will be deeper. Anything can happen to cause this line to appear, from increase of power and knowledge to all the negatives emotions that can be very strong. Sometime you can't even see the line as you just fly through it so fast and carrying out 'evil' thoughts becomes second nature.

What is 'evil'. How to you know what you thought is evil? Some 'evil' thoughts are obvious some are just not that obvious. It is not 'evil' if you follow your heart?

Dreams Part 2

2009-12-02T18:08:00.000+08:00

Dreamt again. This time the dream freaking bluff me. I was in a partially conscious state thus it is easier to be bluff. I dreamt that i received an sms from someone. I know who sent it, but the content itself isn't clear. I know roughly what it is about but i cant read the words properly cause i was still feeling drowsy as I'm still in the middle of my nap. At this time i decided to wait up so i could read the message properly and reply to it. When i opened my eyes, the first thought is " When did i received a message??" Then i realised that it was only a dream.

Recapping on what i had written about dreams from my past post. Dream

"Is this some subconscious tactics by the brain to make me stay in bed longer?
Is this false reality a good thing, when i wake and discover that this is just a dream?
Has what happen cause me so much displeasure and a strong desire to change it create a false reality for me to escape to while i sleep?"

I don't know about the above, but one thing is for sure, dreams are good for you. Either physically; helps to recharge the mind and revitalize the body, or

"To realize that your dreams are unique. No other individual can have your background, your emotions, or your experiences. Every dream is connected with your own "reality". Thus, in interpreting your dreams, it is important to draw from your personal life and experiences.
Remember that a dream unifies the body, mind, and spirit. It provides you with insight into ourselves and a means for self-exploration. In understanding your dreams, you will have a better understanding and discovery of your true self."

Yeah I'm drawn to dream interpretation already! I'm still trying to figure out this dream of mine.. And any of you out there who had any recent dreams come find me to interpret as through this i can learn more in this area. =)

Follow Your Heart

2009-12-01T23:54:00.001+08:00

I forgot what i want to blog. Sometimes you just cant get back the lost thoughts..

Time For Miracles

2009-12-01T00:42:00.002+08:00

Attachment. Everyone has attachment in some form or another. Attachment can be created from strong emotions that you experienced during that time. E.g. There is this 3 songs that when every time i listen to them, the past memories of the time in contact with this particular friend will start coming back to me. With these memories are the different emotions i felt during that time. Not that i still feel the same way now, but these is just part of a memory that will trigger by attachment to a subject. Some people do use this attachment method to improve their memory.

Im alrdy missing this particular baby kitten that i hold it in one of my hands and cup it with the other to keep it warm. How vulnerable it is. Really makes you want protect it even if it cause your life. Isnt this how love feels?

I've given myself to the end of this week to prepare myself. From next week, alot of things are going to change. Even though i feels that the time isnt enough and im still so not really for the changes, but it is still going to happen next week.

A Stroll down .... lane

2009-11-29T00:22:00.004+08:00

I felt my head ache before i ended work. It pains all the way till after i bathed. Even then i decided to go out anyway but luckily it ends after i finished preparing to leave. I dont rmb when is the last time i had a headache. Must be that im not having enough rest. Another excuse to rest more haha.

Went orchard to shop. Retail therapy rocks haha. Spend over a hundred not counting voucher. We walked from OC all the way to ion. Really happening.

Saw one guy doing pickup, and can see the salesgirl is interested. But problem arised when customers came. He just stood at that spot and waited for a few minutes that he went to look at the display. He was lucky the girl wasnt facing him. If she returns or see that the guy waited at that spot, his value will sure to drop.

The centrepoint and OC both have live band playing while u shop. Luxurious shopping exprience.

One woman crossing the traffic light last stop in the middle of the road and took pics of the cars with the headlights shining towards her. power.

Accident between a taxi and a lorry along grange road. Two police car came.

Fighting between malays at the walkway beside taka.

Found one romantic place in the midst of orchard. Nice venue to go on a date.

ARGGG WTF. TVD next episode air on 14 jan 2010. 0.0

Pain

2009-11-27T19:28:00.002+08:00

I thought one night is enough to smoothen the pain but when the night falls again, the pain seems to reappear. When can i be free of it? It hurts.

Smile

2009-11-25T18:27:00.002+08:00

"When you're in the market for shoes, you being to look at everyone's feet. When you decide to change your hairstyle, you look at everyone's haircut."

That is why exposure is important. When you are expose to something new, you start to notice things that you did not notice before. For example, if you ain't into photography, will u notice the possible nice shots either scenery or candid you can take when you are walking around? If you ain't into psychology, will u notice why someone is acting or behaving in this particular way?

So now, how will you increase your exposure? :)

Angels Or Devils

2009-11-24T23:59:00.002+08:00

Just had a talk with someone. I dont know what to feel but i guess that this is better for everybody.

Insights

2009-11-23T22:27:00.004+08:00

Why cant our report writing be based on this kind of stuff? I will be more than happy to do reports then. The whole chunks of words before are mostly quoted from the book "Mind Powers How To Use And Control Your Unlimited Potential" - Christian H Godefroy. This book talks about parapsychology. Another good book introduced by my dad. There just so many good books with me but im haven have that strong a desire to read them all yet.. I had to type this whole thing out, made my effort worth while by absorbing something :) Here goes:

- For children, drawing is just like breathing - it's a completely natural function
For us adults, drawingis a gift reserved for a special few. Some people draw, some write, some think, some drive a truck. Thes kind of specialization, the division of tasks into categories, leads to the fragmentation of human beings. We become limited.

(Limitation isnt good. Think of ways to not become limited by life.)

- Negative opinions we hold about ourselves. For a long time I maintained a highly negative self image. Whenever I had trouble with my homework, for example, i would immediately conclude that '...I could never understand, I'd nvever suceed.' Of course that would only make the work that much more dificult.

(Like the author, i myself have tried my best to rid of negative self image. It happened only just ard a year ago. I noticed alot of people have negative self image, they say they will never and they can't do it too soon. It sort of becomes a habit for them. Why set an archoring point for urself? Ard a month ago, there is this particular negative self image of mine came creeping back to visit me. I almost lost the confident i slowly build up through the years. I was emotionally tired for that few days but lucky it had past me now. Not to self praise or anything, but some people say im smart. But to me, i dont think im. Not that smart anyway. If im smart why cant i get distinction after just read once through? ;) I think maybe because of not having negative self image, having confident and not setting limitations to urself, can make us excel in stuff that you do.)

- As Alexis Carrel wrote in his book Man And The Unknown, 'In modern society, most individuals are occupied with activities that could be categorized as practical. This is done out of ignorance, or because people are tricked into believing they must devote all their time to practical matters. Being weakminded, they submit to the infuences of environment in which they find themselves.'

Some people, on the other hand, are aware that they are being manipulated by big business, politics, culture mongers and so on.

Unfortunately, most of us are so preoccuiped with taking care of our day-to-day responsibilities that we rarely have an opportunity to make full use of our intelligence and / or imagination. We see young executives fresh out of university, brimming with new and exciting ideas, slowly fade as wthey are worn down by the rigid demands of the companies they work for. Their natural psychic abilities are soon extingusihed by the grinding routine they have to put up with.

(Think of situation where the environment infuences you. Why isnt it good? Or why isnt it bad? To me, weakminded people are not stupid people. To become strong minded, there's two ways that i know. One, read alot of self-improvement category books. Two, suffer alot of setbacks and recover from it. Alot, and i mean alot of people dont make full use of our intelligence/imagination. Including myself, i know i can be even more than this. The reasons, which most probably is the same for everybody, is we are lazy mentally. We give ourself excuses like theres too much sch work and stuff to do other things. Excuses like we need to concentrate on studying and get into a university. And therefore we are lazy to do other stuff, to think more. As you had in some way heard before, we only are using ard 10% of our brain capacity. Some use more, some use less. But it is still ard 10%. Dont u ever thought of pushing ur brain to the limit? Break the 10% boundary, maybe to 20% maybe to 50% or even to the max. Maybe when our brain reach 40% we can fly? How cool can that be. Of course this are all guesses, my point is to not limit urself and try not to be lazy. Im trying also...)

Can't let go now

2009-11-22T14:55:00.003+08:00

This isnt the time yet, to let go. This is just starting :) Though i dont have the slightest intention to let go, i just want to type it down. Chances like this dont away comes knocking on your door. I always thought this is reaching the end but actually it is a new beginning. How can i be so pessimistic then.. Tsk tsk. Also after watching TVD, i know if i let go now it will be selfish. I can't be selfish. Wht if...

(Stefan is going to leave town)
Stefan: I know this is hard for you to understand, but im doing it for you.
Elena: No. You don't get to make that decision for me if you walk away it's for you cause i know what i want. Stefan i love you.

TVD always make me go "Wtf how can this series be so good!"

A Goodnight Sleep

2009-11-21T21:31:00.001+08:00

Was totally worn out yesterday and only slept for ard 5hr. Today was basically running on reserved energy. It feels good working with a group of close buddies, we entertain each other like every single moment =) Sometimes at work, we really eat alot. Other then lunch and dinner there are lots of tea breaks, maybe supper and desserts. Meat, fish, chocolate eclairs, fruit tarts, sago, etc...

Just off work, going prawning soon! And i guess i will have a really goodnight sleep tonight.

Throw it all out

2009-11-19T23:07:00.002+08:00

Dont u sometimes feel the need to throw it all out, throw it out until there's nothing left in you. U felt scare cause of the uncertainties that lies ahead. What if you threw something impt away when u do. U know it will be alot better but u feel safe now. Well maybe not completely safe, isnt thats y the thought of throw it all out came to u in the first place.

U shd throw it all out if u feel that u are sick of being in the same spot or going to be sick of it soon. No point being in the same old boring routine of thoughts or behaviours that head no where. U are not alive if u are not living. Live ur life and give it all u've got. Create ur future than waiting for it to happen. Good luck.

Im still laughing

2009-11-18T23:09:00.002+08:00

Today's taboo game was fun! There's alot of laughing. Even until now im still laughing haha.

Was chatting with eugene and...

Eugene:
Catch her red handed for stealing my heart.
Lock her up in a special prison that provides special attention.
Then throw away the key to the lock and never let her leave.

Cheng:
My heart is missing, lost
Even before i can catch her
I hope she wont throw it away

Eugene:
I reach home and found out that my heart was stolen.
Never did I realised that the pickpocket is Her.
Now I hope she wont throw it away
just like how I don't throw away
the heart I stole from her...

Cheng:
Wonder how im still alive without a heart
No steady beatings in me now
Can u feel it thumping somewhere
Is it close or is it far
Love is all i have now

Eugene:
Its because of you, the food I eat becomes more tasty.
Its because of you, the music I hear becomes more beautiful.
Its because of you, the colours in my life becomes more vibrant and colourful.
Its because of you, that my life have meanings in it.
Its because of YOU, Life is worth living for!

My last laugh for today:

Eugene:
on top of me
Cheng:
lol
foating or resting?
Eugene:
ON ME
riding
LOL!

Broaden my horizon

2009-11-17T23:20:00.002+08:00

Met up with GX just now. Accompanied her as she collects her stocks from her boss. Was abit jealous looking at all the qualatex in different colours in large quantities haha. Will be getting sempertex tmr. Then i can spam and do other interesting sculptures.

Where it all started

2009-11-17T14:07:00.002+08:00

Suddenly my thoughts when back to where i started learning abt things not related to sch. It becomes a habit after that. My dad always inspire us to learn more, not putting that much an impt on sch results, just do wht we can. Therefore stress in sch doesnt comes from my parents but only the work itself and ur own desire to perform.

Sometimes u have to stop for awhile. Let ur soul float outwards and let it hover behind u, looking down and inspecting urself. Look inside urself. The soul floating isnt u now. Leave all the biasness and sentences that u lied to urself with the body. Observe as a spectator.
Are u escaping from something? Why are u doing it?
Are u trying to hard to be what u are not?
Are sad? Are u angry? Stop hiding ur emotions deep inside, let it out.

We are created with tear glands, so let it out and cry.
We are created with a mouth, so let it out and say.
We are created with arms, so let it out and hug.
We are created to make friends, so let it out.

Love

2009-11-16T22:07:00.003+08:00

The Vampire Diaries is still freaking awesome. The show plays with ur emotions, and if a show can do that it is a really good one indeed. Their twist is just enough to keeps u interested and the show isnt draggy. *Thumbs up*

Love makes you evil
Love makes you good
Love makes you sad
Love makes you happy
Love makes you give up
Love makes you grab hold
Love makes you angry
Love makes you at ease
Love makes you stupid
Love makes you think
Love makes you believe..

LT Attention

2009-11-15T15:40:00.003+08:00

Yesterday SP mentioned the topic of a guy avoiding a girl. After doing some research this is wht i got:

1) know u like him, but no feeling, runs away
2) know u like him, but no feeling yet dun wan to lose a friend, draws line
3) know u like him, but no feeling and dun wan hurt ur feelings, stammer and being indecisive and shows signs of avoiding
4) know u like him, and got feeling, confess soon
5) dun know u like him, but he like u, shows interest in u and attempts to catch ur attention
6) know u like him, got feeling, yet unsure of how to confess
7) know u like him, but no feeling, yet feel like toying with ur feelings

If he knows and you're getting scary, like doing uncool childish stuff to get his attention it will be a total turn-off. Then probably he'll avoid you. Because he'll get scared and disgusted by your acts of annoyance. Girls are meant to be mature, cool and play a little hard to get. A bit like what you're doing. That's what makes the boy interested in you. Unlike a girl who is so accepting and easy for the boy to get. But don't play TOO hard to get, because if he likes you means he likes you.

Girls will never understand us guys

Well there are a variety of reason a man shows intrest then stops. Because I don't know the details of the situation, I'll just answer generally. A few reasons that I can give you are as follows:

1. He may have heard rumors (or truths) about you and your sexual history, which may have made him hestiant to persue a relationship with you.

2. He may have just ended another relationship and used you as the 'in between' or 'rebound' girl. It's not fair, necessarily, but many men feel that it will hurt them less if they have someone interested in them to 'fall back on' when they are recovering from a relationship.

3. Fear of rejection. Men face this obstacle as often as women do, and sometimes moreso because of the social pressures put upon them to be the active 'seekers' in the relationship. A lot of women don't realize how often men get rejected in social settings after they've finally mustered up the courage to ask a girl out. And it can still be nerve-wracking after you've been dating. Men have body issues just like women, and may be self-conscious about certain parts of their anatomy, if there is a sexual theme and they shy away, this may be the reason.

4. You may be sending mixed signals. Are you showing interest or are you being brash? Are you talking with him casually or are you flirting? Make sure that you are consistent with the messages you send, both verbally and physicall. I'm not suggesting you jump in the sack with him, but let him know that you're interested (if you are). Don't wait for him to call and ask you out if you'd like to spend time with him. Make sure that if you want to spend time, hang out, go on a date, that you let him know. Guys like a girl with initiative.

Also because guys don't have the patience to play the stupid games that girls want to play. The whole "mixed signals" and the "Now I like you, oh but now I don't" that a lot of girls frequently play loses the interest of men very fast. Not that men are purely seeking a quick fix, or don't like a challenge, but if a girl decides to play games, the guy will choose to move on to someone else who will make his time more valuable and less frustrating.

There's always new stuff to discover when i do research. Always love the "uh-ha" and "ohhh" moments. =)

Parapsychology

2009-11-13T22:48:00.002+08:00

Attended a seminar regarding parapsychology. The speaker is someone from scotland. He is up on his age and shared with us stories and his own expriences on alot of aspect of parapsychology. It includes esp, telekinesis, clairvoyance, predictions, 2nd sight, astral travel, black magic etc. Interesting.

Sushi for supper again =) And im going to start playing and learning balloons sculptures.

Learning

2009-11-12T15:46:00.003+08:00

Knowing too much might not be a good thing but it wont stop me from learning even more. When u know y someone does something even if he might or might not know can u blame him? My learnings told me u cant.

Part of the day, there's anger in me. Signs of it escaped at some moment but it was keep inside for the rest of the time. I was just really quiet. I guess this behaviour had developed naturally in me after i became more mature after puberty. Thinking back now, i know the power i had when i was angry, an uncontrollable power then can cause regrets. Silence and avoid the source of ur anger is the best way.

Happy Birthday Jolinda!

2009-11-11T22:49:00.012+08:00

Met up with GX to help her take some photos for her name card. After that while we were waiting for Jo, she taught me how to make balloons sculptures! haha so fun! Jo came and joined us soon after and we passed her the presents.

My first teddy bear -.- one of the arms busted

This is "Casper" made by GX.

After that, GX went off to meet XM to run. Jo invited me to join her and her friend for dinner. =)

Casper was following Jo ard like this in public. Tsk tsk how brave he is to chase the girl he likes.

Jo has so many presents, so jealous. I like this bday card, it is really creative and touching. Almost cried after reading it, as if. Haha.

The Answer

2009-11-09T17:56:00.002+08:00

My dad went all the way to jurong point to buy this book, the most i can do is to start reading it today!

To buy or not to buy

2009-11-08T21:03:00.003+08:00

List of stuff im thinking of buying at this moment:

1. Skateboard
2. Punching bag
3. Micophones with pop filter
4. New acoustic guitar

It has been so long since i had sushi. When my mom asked if i want anything for supper, i said sushi! So delicious. =)

Belle

2009-11-07T22:00:00.002+08:00

Today is so interesting, im starting to get the picture.

E F is so fun haha and i succeeded in O.

A gf 3 yrs younger than me is too young. Maybe not when im older but not now. Secondary sch girls to me are still too immature.

Stephanie and the long hair girl. i think u two will be in my head for sometime before i forget u girls. haha
Thank you!

Responsiblity

2009-11-05T23:52:00.002+08:00

Making others responsiblity our own? Good and the bad.

Jamming tmr!

Alot of things to do from now to tmr before i leave for sch. But i need the slp also. Hai.

Dreams

2009-11-04T18:00:00.002+08:00

The dreams i had while i nap are so sick. This will be the 2nd dream that shows a scene which im not sure is the future or is the re-run of the past or the past after the past. But this time, what happen is wht i want the scene to be like.
Is this some subconscious tactics by the brain to make me stay in bed longer?
Is this false reality a good thing, when i wake and discover that this is just a dream?
Has what happen cause me so much displeasure and a strong desire to change it create a false reality for me to escape to while i slp?

Dear Diary.

New

2009-11-04T13:53:00.003+08:00

New Motto, new perceptive, new mindset, how about a new reality?

One of my mottos is put to the test today after i didnt do wht i had told myself. Learning from my mistakes, thus new motto is up to fully enforce wht i had told myself along with other things.

Things to ponder:
Shd i join GX to run?

Creating anger?
Creating saddness?
Creating happiness?

Dear Diary.

Anticipation

2009-11-03T22:13:00.003+08:00

You will never know what tmr brings. So u anticipate. When u keep anticipating, u wont be enjoying today cause u will be caught up in preparing for tmr. Keep waiting for something to happen is anticipating. Why not make things happen. Today, be more observant, grab the opportunities and create the moments u are anticipating.

Dear Diary. =)

Hugs & Kisses

2009-11-02T22:34:00.003+08:00

Opportunities. I realised i have miss one opportunity a few mins after i had missed it. This is a opportunity spotted too late. I suppose there are opportunities that i dont even notice at all. I thought i was observant, but now i know it is only one part of being observant. The other part needs more attention.

Be there. Be there even though the person has given up hope, when the person is struck in a place where they feel there's no escape from, be there even when the person betray you and almost get you killed. Just be there.

Friends help you find your way out.

If a girl is whining, complaining about something on and on and u cant even interupt her, just kissing her. =)

Xtreme SkatePark

2009-11-01T23:59:00.003+08:00

Today was alright. Even though alot of things went wrong. Xtreme SkatePark was too cool to not go in and try. Love it. How i wish i live near to ecp now haha.
At one moment while i was there, this little caucasian girl started talking to me. She was adorable. Today is her bday. She turned eight years old, and there is this "8" badge on her shirt. It is so brave skating at this extreme park. Her sweet little voice going "Do you want to go first?" and "Does it hurt?" makes me feel all sweet inside. How i wish most singaporeans would be like this.

Friends always make me smile and laugh. Cheers to friends! =)

Has been thinking and pondering abt something for sometime now. So if u see me stoning it is most probably me thinking of this somemore. Just intrude my thoughts it is ok.

Halloween

2009-11-01T11:32:00.003+08:00

ARG. I nv celebrate halloween! Why didnt our sch have a halloween event or something. Will be going to miss it.

*Your lips keep moving but i dont know why.* Nice!

I'm the one who wants to be with you

2009-10-30T21:06:00.002+08:00

I feel better after it rained tonight and repeated listening to this song,
Mr Big - To be with you. Dont rmb when's the last time i heard this song. It is super. Sharon indirectly make my day again. =)

I was hoping the rain would continued into late at night but it seems to have stopped.

Im tired

2009-10-30T16:25:00.002+08:00

Reached home not feeling good. 3 things. I should take my afternoon nap but i dont feel like it. Will have a really good night slp latr.

1) One month plus ago, my mind is make up to not train anymore. Someone suggested to go gym today from the start of this week. Through the days has been slowly conditioning my mind for the start of training again. It got cancelled at the last min. This is so tiring to the mind.

I feel that there is this storage in me that is storing up energy, and when this energy gets larger and larger, i need to find ways to release it. Ways includes training and parkouring. I wish i got a punching bag in my house.

2) Yesterday Eugene told me abt one of the exercise that makes him cry. "What do you want?" I has been asking myself too. Got the ans just now. It is not a hard, complicated thing to want but it just seems far. Made me tear alittle.

3) Another feeling im feeling now seems familiar. It scares me.

I always picture myself as the survivor, the one who wont be destroyed by hurdles laid infront of me. Now, i released that the thing that would kill me is myself and it scares me.

JS - Officially Missing You

2009-10-28T23:27:00.004+08:00

Has been listening to this song for quite sometime. Nice duet. Loved Janice, towards the front where her mouth closed from left to right plus the mini-wink is so sexy.

FIVE books lining up to be read, studied and revised. When will I start?

An urge to write a new song. When will i start?

Currently, afternoon nap is taking up alot of time. 3hr plus of nap isnt good. Going to solve this by sleeping earlier at night, then i can go to sch earlier, nap lesser and more thus having more time.

If you ask me why i go back to blogging, it is because i figured that i only willing to write in my diary those hidden thoughts and secrets. Other then those i guess i can blog them here.

This is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning

2009-09-22T14:09:00.005+08:00

Winston Churchill quotes

I've finally lost the interest to blog. So this will be the last entry.

Maybe this blog will reopened in the future. Till then.

What's new

2009-09-16T00:33:00.002+08:00

Past few days, 3 season premieres of tv series. =)
Still waiting for 2 more to premieres which will make a total of 5 series that i will be catching every week lol, on top of movies.

Kanye West is an ass. Gd luck to him.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/music/musicblog/2009/sep/15/kanye-west-jay-leno

Hot

2009-09-15T00:56:00.002+08:00

This is suppose to be a long post but i dont feel like writing so much.

Updates.

9-11 Sep
NYPPC Camp

12 Sep
Philip Morris Family Day is quite interesting in a way

3

2009-09-09T00:13:00.001+08:00

District 9

2009-09-06T21:07:00.002+08:00

(District 9) The aliens are so vulnerable in this movie but the aliens' weapons are powerful. The humans abused and treat the aliens badly. So will they pay the price when help returns for the aliens?

Haeundae

2009-09-06T00:04:00.003+08:00

(Haeundae) Comedy at the front part then the disaster strucks. Show the fragility and nobility of life. Be good to ppl and they will save ur life. Be nasty to ppl and they will still save ur life. Funny, exciting and touching.

R&R!!

2009-09-05T01:26:00.007+08:00

Movies watched recently:

(The Boat That Rocked) U know why it rocks? Cause it is a radio boat play rock and roll songs from the 60s. They had so much fun! That you will feel the fun they are having. The boat totally rocks!

(Terminator Salvation) Cool movie. The machines are so freaking awesome. U see the humans and the machines and u know humans can just give up lol.

(Sophie's Revenge) It is a comedy but i only fun some parts funny, some are just plain idoitic. i will go omg, stop throwing ur own face. Revenge is stupid, why cant she just forget and move on. Quite comical cause zhang ziyi is a comic drawer in the movie.

Blew it

2009-09-03T22:10:00.002+08:00

Today was so fun. Together with Dianne, Guanlin and kenny, went kallang leisure park for ice skating and after that went bowling. We sure got alot of attention at the ice skating rink, i wonder why haha. I think luck went out earlier today. Going there was alright but when we were coming back, leaving leisure park, it was o.o.

Totally blew it. That was the ______ of getting a __________. Yea, i can see it happen now. But at that moment, i think i feel too comfortable in my _______-____. Hai... Even if it is better outside? I dont think so. Blew it! ARGG.

Maybe that is not my fate. A better ___ awaits? 10 _________ one? Haha hope so.

Why it didnt happen.
Option 1
1) No _________ (Why?)
2) Cause of my ____ (A cure?)
3) It too large a ___ (For it to happen?)
4) Study ______ (Why is it delayed?)
(This option is full of uncertainty and need a longer time supposedly. If accomplished, success is comfimed. It is more material.)

Option 2
1) Dont care cause _____ doesnt matters.
2) Fight _______ (How to?)
(This option is easier and the time needed can be 1 mins to 10yrs and more. It is all in the mind.)

Obviously im currently taking the option 2. But option 1 keeps surfacing itself and having conflicts with option 2. Option 1 has alot of other advantages so it is confirm that i will start this no matter wht. With necessarily things to do + going out + working + thing i like to do. It just takes time.

The problem is: I cant wait much long, im suffocating even though i wont die for it.

So wht is my plan?
Go sleep first. =) Nights.

=/

2009-09-02T23:00:00.002+08:00

I want to fall. All im thinking abt so frequently now.

*lightbulb* I can write a song with this feeling.

Parkour: The art of movement

2009-09-01T23:58:00.005+08:00

Trained today. Fight and flight is what i've decided to train for from now on. Will be joining kick boxing for fight. Parkour for flight. Of course it is not going to be restricted to this 2. U might say flight? Why flee in the face of danger? That must depends on the objective, flight is sometimes neccessary.

Fear. Scared. What if. Will be a challange mentally during training also. But i see endess advantages in this training above physically and mentally.

Some might say that singapore isnt suitable for parkour but after this few trainings + tours, i find quite a number of possible parkour spots. Which is good news.

More To Come

2009-09-01T23:49:00.003+08:00

Jian da came over for lunch today. He played a nice version of cai hong on the guitar and he said he will be passing me the score the next time he sees me. Alot of nice movies coming out.

This movie is about smart ppl trying to outsmart one another. Each has spies in their rival company. May the smartest one win and get away with money/profits/competitive advantage over another.

Thai Express

2009-09-01T01:25:00.003+08:00

When haji lane again with Christine and Zheyu. Then ate thai express at iluma. The food are really nice. The price is worth the food lol. Met eugene outside bottle tree park after that. Went to tour the park and had fun waving touchlight and jumping ard. =)

A dream

2009-08-30T23:14:00.003+08:00

Last night i had a dream of a girl (who i know). She prepared dinner with my mom. When i woke up from my nap, She had left, having something to do and can't stay for dinner.

Interpreting this dream, it seems that .....

Still can't get pass myself

2009-08-29T18:40:00.000+08:00

Had Basketball game with the guys this morning. Had 2 days of training previously and today basketball. My aching muscles need to rest.

After lunch,

2009-08-29T18:37:00.001+08:00

Board the bus home...

Banlieue 13

2009-08-28T20:57:00.003+08:00

Banlieue 13 is also freaking nice! Even better then Banlieue 13 - Ultimatum. The first movie shows how the 2 friends met each other. Awesome storyline.

Process

2009-08-28T00:37:00.002+08:00

Emotionally crushed and strengthen mentally
Breakdown your muscle and grow stronger
Fail constantly and becomes better each time
Keep falling and becomes immune to the pain
Break your bones to make them tougher
Discard the old and welcome the new
Destory yourself repeatly and be invincible

Light graffiti

2009-08-27T00:16:00.003+08:00

Had acually planned to go to marina barrage for the light graffiti but we wait for quite some time and the bus did not appear. Went to the bottom of esplanade bridge instead.

Happy Birthday Lulu

2009-08-24T23:50:00.000+08:00

GL surprise was a success =)

Highness

2009-08-22T12:06:00.005+08:00

Update!

Past few days was a blast.

It all started after the end of the last paper. Went to watch G.I. Joe ate dinner at Hong Kong Cafe and went K box. We were quite high towards the end.

But the highest moments is of course yesterday night! PARTY! Went clubbing with Alex, Christine and her friend and Sharon at powerhouse! Freaking high! =) Came home slpt at 5:30 and couldnt fell aslept. Woke up ard 10:30 and dont feel tired. Weird haha.

Sry guys couldnt join u guys for basketball. It is too early. No sleep + Basketball = Die

All of outings coming up. Of course includes clubbing again!

The best bday wish i've received: (Coolness!)

"HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY BRO!! :-D May all your wishes and dreams come true. May all the girls you fancy flock to you like Crazy! Not to mention the bulk you always wanted :), resulting i a ripped body! May there be one day where all your extreme stunt dreams (jumping off a plane, bungee jumping, climbing buildings, urban running around estates, jumping roof to roof, and the endless list of stuff that i always thought was insane, and would normally push a normal person's boundaries beyond his mental and physical limits. But amazingly, you found it incredibly fun to execute them... Haha :-D), would be a reality! All the Best for all that you do Bro:). Take care!"

From Marc. Thanks bro!

Banlieue 13: Ultimatum a french movie. This is what i call a good action film. Freaking nice. Im so going to watch it again. Awesome fighting, insane parkout-ing and the story line is cool. The 2 friends inside combined is what i want to be!

Brithday

2009-08-20T01:02:00.003+08:00

All the birthday wishes and gifts are appreciated. Thanks! =)

This whole night is so busy compared to past few days. Had been helping ppl with their final revision. -.-

Need to be on the phone even when i cut my hair. Tsk.

If i screw up tmr's paper i will hunt all of u down. haha nah just kidding.

Ahh nice

2009-08-18T22:50:00.002+08:00

Again i reach a point where i dont wish to continue studying. I think i can do well with my current standard + depends on luck.

Lol my head is feels heavy after drinking martell. It is freaking nice!

Think i will go sleeping now.

Crashed

2009-08-17T23:17:00.002+08:00

The Martell is freaking tempting. I try to not drink it today lol.

MARTELL

2009-08-17T00:18:00.002+08:00

Relaxing while drinking martell now =)

Asked Christine on how to mix. haha the exprienced one.

I think the 1/3 bottle of martell has been ard for more than 10 yrs. lol.

Will have a gd night slp latr.

Lala land

2009-08-16T14:36:00.003+08:00

Haha just woke up. My phone batt died so the alarm didnt rang. Time to start studying!

There is this relax atmosphere in the air when i woke up. The weather is really good.

Had a same dream. The same thing happened in the dream in the same scenario. Only this time there i can see some fimiliar faces in my dream.

Ghee

2009-08-16T03:40:00.002+08:00

Just finished watching "Fighting". It is just average. Too little fighting.

See. My plan is to remove the distraction by tonight so tmr i can focus on studying. It is worth it to slp late and wake up later tmr. No distractions then. lol o.o.

Crow Zero 2! Can't wait!

One day down

2009-08-16T01:22:00.006+08:00

Today was the lastest yet. Took the last train to typ just in time.

Lol my father just told me we going to eat out tmr, early celebration of my brother and my bday. Means? less time for me to study. zz i want to do alot of pass yr paper. Loving the calculations. When u complete a ques with no or minimum mistake how good does that feel? =D

Got a bowl of noodles to finish before i can go slp. Supper prepared by my mom.. So tempted to watch "Fighting" now!

Maybe i watch part of it and finish the rest tmr :)

Plans Plans Plans

2009-08-15T00:37:00.004+08:00

Things to do in the holidays:
ALOT

So much althought some i haven even thought of it yet. lol
Outings itself would take up plenty of days.
Work take up some.
Jamming
Recording
Learning instruments
Reading
Photography
Stocks
Overseas trip?
Other interest that will pop out again
New interest

Suddenly felt inspired and motivated by Sharon. I think im going to sign up for vocal course! WOOT!

Phew

2009-08-14T00:40:00.004+08:00

Thought the law paper was in the morning. Was kind of anxious just now as i dont seems to have any time left to memorise a single thing. Used up the whole day abt 12 hrs completing my notes. It was 9 pages long.

LUCKILY tmr paper starts at 4pm. I got a few hrs to start uploading every infomation from this 9 pages of notes. This few hrs is critical!

After tmr's paper things will be so much easier. Love calculations!

Double fillet for dinner again and sushi for supper. Dont seems to be gaining any weight still. lol.

Tomorrow will be productive

2009-08-13T00:28:00.002+08:00

Was walking passed the kitchen slowly looking around and my mom said
"looking for food to eat again?" haha it was funny.

Had cereals with milk for supper, not shaker fries and had seaweed struck in the teeth lol.

Today was sort of recovering from yesterday's setback of slacking and slping late. Tmr's plan is to finish my notes for remaining 6 chps for law and 1 tax, 1 cost, 1 finance paper. 1 to 2 chps of law then 1 paper then back to law then another paper etc. It will make me fall asleep to work on law continuously.

Just when im starting to feel plenty of time on my hands. With fri afternoon, sat, sun and the afternoons after every papers to finish touching up my revision. Now, i need to go back to work on satudays. Alot of events going on this sat and they are short of ppl.

Eat

2009-08-12T02:09:00.001+08:00

Damn. Didnt study much today. Was basically slacking the whole time.

It is scary how much i can eat. Was just wanting something to chew and unknowingly i finished 8 slices of rasins bread while typing the story in the previous entry (It is so freaking long..). Just felt like writing after a small thing that happened today.

What is this feeling?

2009-08-12T01:52:00.007+08:00

How I Felt & Feel

March On

2009-08-10T23:29:00.005+08:00

Had not been studying at night for a few days alrdy. I hope this dont becomes a habit haha.

Tonight was good, learned/memorise the guitar tab for a new song. Really tempted to make a cover and tribute it to ppl. Maybe i will. =)

"Like soldiers march on
If we can make it through the night
We'll see the sun

Even when there's no one there for you, march on
Even when the days are long for you, march on
Like soldiers, march on"

Fall in love all over again with Good Charlotte. Can't wait for their newest ablum coming out soon!

Stop and Rest

2009-08-09T23:47:00.002+08:00

Watched 神话 again on TV. Kim Hee-seon is REALLY beautiful in the movie.

I feels like i had suddenly hit a wall. Suddenly feels the lack of energy to carry on studying. I wonder if it is the sad ending of the movie that had affected me or am i just tried. Guess i shd stop studying for the night.

Boost

2009-08-08T23:23:00.002+08:00

Had double fillet O fish meal with shaker fries and green tea for dinner.

Watch "I Love You Man" after dinner.
Quoted: "Trying is having the intention to fail. You got to scrap that word from your vocab. Say u gonna do it and u will."

Supposedly gave myself 3 hrs of break but guess i've overshot. Decided to give myself the night off in the end. =)

Studying had started to become dry and monotone. This night will be like a shirt soaked in water and tmr will be put out to dry in the sun again. ;)

I see it working

2009-08-08T01:10:00.002+08:00

Gaining speed now. Studying seems to fall nicely into my routine now. Working on 2nd module now and by tmr with go into the 3rd.

I still rmb the last time i was studying and i give myself till a certain time and i will go relax, away from studying. Time seems to move slower then. And when i looked at the time i will go like "EH! only 15 mins past?".

Time now still moves slower when im studying. But, it is working to my advantage. I feel that i have more time on my hand now. When i look at the time, "2pm? wow i still have so many hours till night!"

This is how a change in perspective can help in certain situations. Change how u see time and change how u see studying can make a big difference.

Flesh Imp

2009-08-04T22:47:00.003+08:00

My next holiday's makeover is flesh imp! Like some of the things they sold there.

Was shopping for Kenny's Bday present with Eugene, Cs, Ly and Alex this afternoon. Walked all ard orchard. In this particular shop this salesperson says "welcome" and i turned and saw this pretty face. wow. :) need to record the venue here incase i forgotten it somehow.

a
apple
in
my
room
starts
to
interview
a
wall
(2,1,alt,opp)

It is easy

2009-08-03T23:26:00.004+08:00

Heavy studying starts today.

Exams are coming and im excited! Wonder if i can finish studying the 5 modules and have enough practice that will enable me to exceed. =) So little days left minus away the days i will be working.

It is a good thing for me to studying, the more i study, the more i feel that it is going to be easy to excel in exams. lol.

The new song playing,

Leona Lewis - Loving You
"Loving you has made my life so beautiful"

Heard this song in a wedding. Really sets the mood. Awesome.

Beautiful Sunset

2009-07-30T23:05:00.000+08:00

This few days the sunset is really beautiful. I shd carry my cam with me to capture this beautiful moments. When u take sunset anywhere seems to b equally nice cause everything else becomes secondary to the beautiful sun.

Chalet

2009-07-30T23:04:00.001+08:00

Yesterday.

Nice (Y)

False alarm?

2009-07-30T21:53:00.001+08:00

The display is back to normal. Thanks Sis dianne. =)

WTF

2009-07-30T20:54:00.003+08:00

My com display suddenly decided to flip upside down. Wtf like seriously. the mouse moving invertedly and everything is the wrong way. Manage to blogged anyway. Pissed. Chaos in this busy times.

Arggg

2009-07-28T23:24:00.003+08:00

Everytime i think of it, i feel sucky.
But i can feel it getting closer when ea day passes.
Soon seems to be an escape route.
But some things take time.

The Fear

2009-07-24T01:15:00.004+08:00

We are born with only one fear: the fear of loud noises. All other fears are acquired as we move through life. When we were four years old, we all could sing. When we were four years old, we all could draw. But then we started to go to school and for the first time, we began to compare ourselves to others. We looked over at another kid's drawing and for the first time, we felt that maybe we couldn't draw.
Society has ingrained in our consciousness the notion that we might not be as good as someone else. Or, equally common, our parents conveyed to us through their words or their actions from an early age that we simply were not good enough.

"If you could see yourself the way others see you, you would be amazed."

"No matter what happens, you are still you. You never lose"

Quoted from someplace.

People often tries to find more information to distract them from taking action

2009-07-23T23:49:00.003+08:00

Previously i was wondering and thought i knew the ans. Then i happen to wander upon another ans the make sense somehere...

I Wonder

2009-07-23T21:34:00.002+08:00

Past few days was tiring. Now the small little tests are all over. Planned to rest a day or two and start preparing for the big one.

I wonder wht is stopping me. I think the biggest reason is same for most. The ...

Nice

2009-07-20T00:06:00.003+08:00

Went gym and played abit of frisbee on friday morning. Went work after that. As everybody hadnt tried the "chalet room" before, we think tonight is the night as work on sat is quite early. These 2 days were fun. Was laughing alot. =)

The room and environment was great. Felt relaxing, got a feeling of vacation, away from the urban world. Before sleep, the funny guy D was telling us stories after stories. His stories are always good. Sure to have humor in it. One part, he joked if tmr morning want to play basketball at 5am. Bathed and when to slp ard 2am. Was drifting into and out of slp the whole night. Guess the others were too. Too tired and cold to slp...

The funny thing is, something happened in the night. Ken 被鬼压 hahaha. JS, who slpt beside him told his side of the story was very funny lol. And, when D woke up at 4:48am to go to the loo, Ken after the "incident" asked: "Hey you going to play basketball?" D: "Ps, i going toilet"...

Sat. One point we were resting and so started telling jokes. haha great laugh.

=)

2009-07-17T00:51:00.001+08:00

Won't be coming back home after i leave my house tmr morning. Wonder where i will be staying? lol =)

Have I Told You I Ache

2009-07-10T02:14:00.002+08:00

Trying so hard not to be emo right now. Not feeling happy about myself. How can anyone be happy if there's so many unfinish stuff to do, targets yet to be hit and complex ques you ask urself is not anwsered.

Will be blogging less for awhile, need to concentrate more on getting things on the right path.

Will be back will more fun stuff soon. =)

And... Im still here.

2009-07-07T01:06:00.000+08:00

COME ON!

Got A Feeling

2009-07-06T21:47:00.001+08:00

that i will be sleeping before 11 tonight.

Bom Bom Bom

2009-07-05T00:50:00.002+08:00

Credits goes to SP.

The Heart Never Lies

2009-06-30T23:47:00.008+08:00

Today's urban run wasnt good. It is too hard to run with a bagpack on. Cant go fast. Was simply jogging and walking throughout. I planned to be out 2 hrs and it was ard 2 hrs exactly.

Angels and Demons. It was really good.

Balls Out: Gary the Tennis Coach. Watchable. The old man is funny. His laughter is so gay.

Screaming Inside

2009-06-29T23:15:00.002+08:00

There so many things i want to do but never and it is piling up.

To hell with everything?

Im so going to grab my bag, throw my tripot and camera in and urban run to dont know where and dont know how long or how far tmr morning.

The Haunting In Connecticut

2009-06-29T23:03:00.003+08:00

Based on true events. Guess it is so. I rmb seeing a documenary abt this haunting last year or something. Not really a scary movie. The way this movie scary u is a sudden loud sound when the spirits appear. This movie is like a drama plus horror kind. Some scenes are really emotional and sad.

Movies

2009-06-29T00:18:00.003+08:00

Movies watched this 2 days:

Knowing
The scenes where the accidents happen was well done haha. U can actually see ppl die...

12 Rounds
Like a typical police-criminal movie.

So tempted to watch The Haunting In Connecticut, a horror film. Nighttime is the time for horror movies =). But it is too late now. Convinced myself to watch it tmr.

Letters From The Sky

2009-06-28T00:06:00.003+08:00

Harpers Island.

Cal sacrifaced himself for his fiancee, stabbed by john wakefield and was push into the river down below the bridge.

Chloe: "You can't have me" (Released her grip on the rails and falls into the river)

R.I.P
Chloe and Cal
Together Forever.

Where are the durians?

2009-06-27T00:22:00.004+08:00

Wish i have a better cam and a tripot with me at that moment.

Megan Fox

2009-06-25T22:15:00.004+08:00

Happy Birthday Mom!

2009-06-25T01:02:00.003+08:00

Gym in the morning. Did endurance training.

Frisbee clinic after that.

Movie. Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen. Totally Awesome. =)

Dine out with family (the crab got alot of meat lol).

Came home. Ate cake. Ate cat mountain king durian (mao san wang) which is known as the husband and also the wife (jing1 feng4). Super nice. =D

Can feel the rain coming. Really like this type of weather. The weather before the rain comes.

Shd be sleeping now. Argg how little sleep i will have.

Megan Fox is too hot to be up here... A special post will coming up just for her lol.

Something Crazy

2009-06-22T23:18:00.002+08:00

A new post just for this one..

Marc:"Now life is kind of boring and i feel like doing something crazy"
YC: "Yar, call me when u want to do it cause im all in" =)

Sometimes when life just gets too routine, u want to do something crazy/ out of the ordinary to make urself feel more alive like a human, and not like some mechanic robot.

Knowledge

2009-06-22T22:33:00.004+08:00

Met Marc, cant he sold his bike.. Thus we walk all the way to gym only to found out that the gym had been closed for youth olympics renovation. We then return back, with him jogging and me riding, to the fitness corner near his house. Did 1 set of circuit then it was lunch. After lunch slacked at the fitness corner. Was really good finally able to chat with him, it has always been great. Saw Donavan also.

Reached home with a strong motivation for training but was feeling lethargic, hydrate myself and ask Aaron out for frisbee instead. Can feel that my throws are improving.

Suddenly feel that i shd get back to reading the books that are compiling. A sudden thirst for knowledge..

Happy Father's Day

2009-06-22T00:21:00.002+08:00

Part of my family went to wake the henderson wave. Met them at vivo for lunch and shopping =D.

After that went to botak jones for Dinner. 8 person bill of $70. Kind of worth it cause there is a free father day meal that consist of a soup, salad, meal course and dessert. lol.

Tmr going gym with Marc! Going to learn some tricks from the iron man.

For this whole week everydays seems to be quite happening. Got to try to use the free time in between to do my to-do-things.

“每一個人心中都有位寂寞先生，與其逃避不如擁抱它，與它對話；你會重新找到愛自己的能力。”

2009-06-21T01:39:00.000+08:00